We are facing the last 10 days of Ramadan. Insha this post will help us concentrate better in Ibadah.
Last Ramadan, I had a special challenge. It was helping my son who is nearly 7 years old fast! He attempted to fast on 21st of Ramadan. Keeping him distracted during hunger was my biggest task. Phew. I had decided if he wouldn’t get distracted, he could break his fast. He enjoyed listening to stories, painting and playing with his younger brother. Then he had a good nap. But last few minutes were the toughest part of the fast for him. Seeing the food arranged on the table, he didn’t want to wait for his meal. Thankfully, he understood he didn’t have to wait for long. He kept looking at his pancakes. You should have seen his smile on hearing the Azan.Alhamdhulillah.Do you think I should have just let him eat five minutes before Magrib athan? No way.
We grownups, unconsciously, behave just like children. Well, even before Ramadan ends we start planning for Eid. Eid is the times for the family get together. So, we start worrying about home decorations and accessories for the clothes.Don’t we have to look perfect on the day of celebration? Hence, we fix appointment at the parlor and pamper ourselves from head to toe. (Even if it includes acts of disobeying Allah!) Are these our main concerns these days? Are the last days of this month meant to be spent away from Quran in markets and spas? Having disciplined ourselves this month, is this how we would like to end this month?!
Dear friends, do you wake up with a zeal to achieve? Does a new day come as a promise for a fresh start to gear up your ambitious plans? Do you have a list of things you wish to accomplish in a day? I guess, you do. Do you always stick to your plan? By the end of the day, are you happy with what you have achieved? Sadly, I have to admit, by the end of the day I’m disappointed.
Well, our days start with fajr Salah (morning prayers) followed by usual routine of sending children to school, house hold chores and so on. In between, we get precious free time to pursue things which add a spark to life. These moments are valuable. That’s when I generally plan to do things I most love. I would love to write about what had been occupying my thoughts. Or, I try to listen to a lecture or explore about something which would interest me or my family. Most of the activities I wish to do involves my faithful laptop – a slave who obeys my command and takes me to sites with a press of a button key.
And then there is something else which interests me too. Before you start thinking of something awful, let me make it clear, I am speaking about NUMERICAL PUZZLES. Yep, complicated numerical puzzles which would result in wonderful loops and patterns once they are solved. As soon as I switch on the laptop, I feel the familiar urge to check the list of free Japanese puzzles. I spot an expert level puzzle and tell myself, “I could do it”. It almost smiles back as though challenging me! I have to solve it. I try it out. After several minutes/ hours of failed attempts, I succeed. Shouldn’t I be pleased that I won? Nah! I try to solve it faster! These puzzles might be improving my mathematical/logical skills. So, where am I using them? Can’t think of anything. Is such a knowledge necessary?
Working on a smart phone should be a better option. Alas, I have loaded several socializing apps like WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram in it. I just can’t keep away from them. I decide to stay alone for a while. Then, I hear a familiar ring. I have to attend it. It could be important message (from a princess in distress ; -P)! I pick it up and plunge again into the world of internet. I see what are others concerned with. I wonder, why am I doing this? Yet, I am there scrolling through the pages. To escape this, I jump back to laptop and face the old temptation. This cycle is no better than a whirlpool sucking productive hours of my life.
Dear reader, how long can you stay away from gadgets? Do you see smart phones as an extension of yourself? Like me are you tempted to hold and fiddle with it? Is your hobby browsing? Do you too start somewhere and end in some other world of internet?What kind of knowledge are we acquiring from countless hours of mindless browsing? Likewise, is there any benefit in merely hearing two different opinions on the same news subject, over and over again. I wonder, how people can allot several minutes/ hours every day for their favorite soap operas. Even if one watches a single episode weeks later, the plot can be guessed. These things which seem basically harmless, are robbing moments from our life. HAVE YOU TOO WILLINGLY BEFRIENDED SUCH A THIEF?
Dua (invocation) for beneficial knowledge
There are better days, when I dedicate myself completely to work. I am interrupted by a familiar cry. It’s from my child demanding attention. To complete my task, the child should be distracted. Guess, what do I hand him? Yes, my laptop. I play some age appropriate video in it. Few minutes later, I see him watching something else. He is not supposed to watch that! What should I do? Ah! Educational Interactive games, that should keep him absorbed.
My job is done. But, now the little one prefers computer over me! I patiently wait for him to complete his game. But when I ask back for the laptop, He refuses. He wants to play more! Next day should be better? No, he demands for the computer every now and then. On refusing, my sweet child throws a tantrum. Does this happen in every home? Are our children’s holidays spent on play station? Are we able to restrict their screen time? With such astounding games, will the children pay attention to books? Will they find pleasure from a normal stroll? Are we in a way turning our children into game addicts? How do you think will such a child spend his/her free time in the future? Are we training them to have a purposeful life?
Dear readers, what is the ultimate purpose of life? Why have we been created?
The purpose of LifeThe world has always played a role from deluding us from the real purpose. The current era has a lot in store to keep us distracted. Now, we are literally wasting our life on games and entertainment.
Life as a amusementI am not against technology. We should be against technology enslaving us. Do we stick to our schedule and use technology for our necessity? Or, are we spending our nights past bedtime entertaining ourselves? Do we end up waking up halfhearted to offer fajr salah? Do we rush our prayers without concentration so that we can go back to gaming? Aren’t we intoxicated by games? Just like an addict we can’t recollect what we uttered in salah. Auzbillah. Will such a prayer be accepted? What will happen of us in the hereafter?
Pray with concentration
It’s time to acknowledge our weakness and get over it. WE NEED TO STOP TECHNOLOGY FROM STEALING TIME. We can do so much more when we are in control of our life. How can we take control?
1. RECOGNIZE YOUR WEAKNESS:
What kind of games/ programmes are you interested in? Why do you like it? I love puzzles. They gives me a sense of achievement.
2. FAITH:
Put your trust in Allah. Request sincerely to Allah to help you overcome the addiction.
3. REPLACE:
Other than computer/TV programmes, what else interests you? If you love news, read it from a newspaper. I love working on something challenging. Some intricate crafts work should help.
4. LEARN SOMETHING NEW:
We humans are born with an appetite to explore and learn. We feel more fulfilled on learning new things. We could learn a new language or craft. I decided to learn Crochet. (Do read my next post -It’s all about crochet.)
Dua (invocation) for knowledge.
5. BELIEVE YOURSELF:
Maybe we were tempted back into browsing/gaming. Still, weren’t we able to keep ourselves away for a considerable amount of time? We can try again. Make a stronger resolution.
6. MOTIVATE:
Involve your family and friends. Ask them to participate with you in this TECHNO CLEANSING program.
7. PLAN:
What do you plan to do between two salah (Prayers)? Stick to it.
Do something rewarding. I told my children, that I would crochet a jumper for them. Every time I was on computer, they would ask me to continue with their sweater! Seeing them wear what I made is rewarding.
You may also add a punishment. Well, if you go back to gaming, once the charge runs out, don’t charge the gadgets for next 10 hours!
8. REMEMBER: WE ARE ACCOUNTABLE FOR THE TIME WE SPEND HERE.
There would be more attractive games and sites. The era we live in is as ordained by Allah. We cannot afford to blame time and lead a heedless life.
Do not abuse TIME
Insha Allah, with this we can prevent gadgets from stealing our time.
Dear readers, share with us your tips to prevent internet overtaking your life. Are there any other such thieves you have befriended? Let us know. Perhaps, we can discuss about them too.
It’s every mother’s dream to bring the best out of her child in the best possible manner. Unfortunately, we are not always at our best. Busy life and constant demand from those around us, has an effect on our parenting. A kind advice and support from an experienced parent/teacher could help us learn where we can improve.
I came across 13 DAY’S ONLINE MUSLIM PARENTING WORKSHOP in a Facebook group. As a mom of two active boys aged 3 and 7, I was not sure, whether I would be able to give the workshop, required attention. I learnt that, it was organized by sister Jamela Ho. I had found her book, “How to guide a child’s behavior”, very practical and useful. I decided to give it a try.
A set of 5 parents with children of same age group were selected. Each day we were sent an email instructing a simple parenting task. Then we were to discuss the task in a private Facebook group. The workshop focused on building 5 essential qualities in a Muslim parent. The task didn’t take much time. When required, sister Jamela, advised us through hadith in a friendly manner. She was easy to approach and showed us where we can improve without being accusative. She participated in the workshop along with us and encouraged us to open up. This is exactly how I felt at the end of two weeks:
I was sad that this journey had come to an end. I had been extra conscious of what I had been doing/ saying to my children. The challenge elevated the level of love and warmth in my home. I was encouraged to hug and kiss my children more often, in return I was able to see them being more at ease. My children were expressing more love and were learning to withhold anger during fights.
It’s a more than a month, since I participated in this workshop. One of the activities involved setting rules in home. My elder son still remembers the rules in the order they were written! He makes sure the rules aren’t broken.
As Muslims aren’t we always meant to nurture our children in best possible manner? If only, we could always learn to be conscious of how we treat our little ones. They are innocent and vulnerable. They are always craving for our love and attention. As parents, we need to remember our children are trusted upon us by Allah; we are obliged to care for them and guide them. This course had been a reminder that my final report is with Allah; We need to be mindful of Allah, in all our actions.
I am glad that I got to be part of this workshop at this early stage of parenting when it is very easy to connect with children and to mend my behavior. As they grow, I’ll have more challenges to face. I hope I could be part of such a workshop then!! To learn more please visit Ilmaeducates – 13 day better muslim parenting challenge.
Nothing is more pleasing to a farmer than his field at the time of the harvest. Now, he can enjoy fruits of his labor. But, he has to pay his debt first. He had incurred it for petty things. Now it sums up to a huge amount! Unwillingly, he has to pay the price for those little things with his hard earned rich harvest. No matter how hard he tries, he falls into the tarps of debt due to his weaknesses, haste and ignorance. Sometimes his harvest is poor. Yet, no mercy is shown to him when the debt is collected. Well, the creditors have their right too. Repayment is the right thing to do. Poor farmer could do nothing to save his harvest.
He learns of a scheme to save himself from a year’s debt. All he had to do is abstain himself from things which get him into debt for a couple of specified days! By doing this his debt will be forgiven. He has nothing to lose. It is not compulsory for him to participate in this scheme. If you are the farmer, would you participate in such a scheme? Who wouldn’t? This scheme is just too good to ignore. Only a fool would ignore it.
Interestingly, Success is called ‘Falah’ in Arabic. Falah also means Farmer! Aren’t we farmers cultivating Righteous deeds for Hereafter? In spite of our best efforts unknowingly and unintentionally we commit sins. These are our debts and we have to pay back with our good deeds. We have no idea how much debt we have incurred. Nor do we know, how much good we have accumulated. We could only get this answer on day judgement. Then it’s too late to save our deeds. What can we do?
Alhumdhlillah. Our Most Merciful creator also gives us chance to save our self from such debts! Well here is one appealing scheme-
Fast on Ashura
Alhamdhulillah, we can save ourselves from minor sins by fasting this Ashoora (10th of Muharam). Yes, it is not compulsory to fast. I trust you are wise enough to make most of this opportunity. Our Merciful Creator is most Beneficent. Let’s not just stop there. Let’s follow sunnah (way of the prophet) and fast a day more! What could be a better way ensure our reward than to follow Sunnah?
Fasting on 9th of Muharram
Just two days of fasting is all it would take to save ourselves from minor sins of past year! Alhamdhulillah. Some of us might not be able to fast on these days. Do not be dishearten. Muharram is also the best month to accumulate good deeds by fasting. The entire month of Muharaam is most preferred month to fast voluntary fasts.
Muharram- Best Month for voluntary fasts
Let us ensure that we fast our missed fard (compulsory fasts) in this month. Then, maybe we can fast some more. Let us make most of Allah’s generosity in this month. Let’s expiate our sins and increase our yield! May we be successful. Aameen.
In this book we see celebration of Eid through eyes of a child. It starts with description of Eid. My 7-year-old son, Zakir, loved reading it with me. Zakir was glued to the book. Later, I was surprised to see Zakir recollect couple of lines from the book. Well, children love rhymes and the language used in this book is rhythmic. The lines he loved are:
“At last, I see the curvy moon!
The celebration will follow soon.”
Even I was able to recollect the excitement on seeing new moon. Author Saima Khan, tactfully incorporated different shapes into the Eid celebration. Even henna designs and soap bubbles are not spared. And what adds sparkle to this book is the way it is illustrated. Children are most likely to try making a copy of the pictures. The images are apt and colorful. Yet, they are simple enough to encourage child to attempt making a copy of it. Small details in the picture made these pictures delightful to explore. My younger son (3 year old) was happy to spot a cat in these pictures!
By the end, the child is questioned about his/her favorite part of Eid holiday. I am happy to say – my son captured the essence of celebration. This made my day. ❤ This book is exciting to read and would make an ideal gift for children in kindergarten and primary school. I had great time listening to it as my son read it aloud.
Alhamdhulillah! Ramadan had been such a blessed month. Though days were long, Allah (s.w.t) made it easy for us to fast. Quran and Salah were our highest priorities in Ramadan. We stole moments fr…
Lulu was applying her dark brown mascara which matched her golden brown dyed hair. She then checks if her beige shirt is neatly tucked into her brown skirt. As she wraps her Italian printed brown scarf around her neck she wonders if she could get cash award.
Lulu was working as a science teacher in a primary school for girls. The teacher, whose students got maximum A grades was to be awarded 1000 Dhs/- at the end of the year. Lulu had always wanted to be a teacher. She had won several awards for her speeches and presentation during her high school and college days. Though inexperienced, getting this job was a piece of cake.
As she walks to school with a branded handbag she thinks, “May be I could be the winner. Students just love me. I get showered by roses from students every day…
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